Oh That Pinterest Baby Shower {& a Poem for the Mamma}

For the Mamma-to-Be,
Well, you’re gunna be a mamma and it is a crazy story
God’s grace so evident as these months have testified to His glory
I don’t know how to make sense of these words in my head
Because there have been so many times wise words you have said

These six years have been sweet and you’ve taught me so much
Like how to cook and clean and use a vacuum and such
You led me to Jesus and have walked with me as I grow up
Your titles could fill a book by now—but these days, mamma is what’s sup!

I can’t wait to tell those boys all kinds of stories like how I gave you shingles
But don’t worry, I won’t ever tell them to make an account on Christian Mingle
An incredible mamma I know you will be
Mostly because you’ve gotten lots of practice being one for me!

These two that squirm around inside
It’s hard to believe they’re just along for the ride
You might walk a little slower and make more frequent stops
But don’t worry someday soon you’ll pop!

I can’t wait to meet them, to touch them, to kiss those cheeks
Don’t worry, I promise I’ll help you out when I can, even if they spring a leak 
The truth is you can’t mess em up too bad
Even if they do some things that make you so mad

Your love is unconditional, unchanging, and true
Only by the grace of God that lives in you
A husband to lead and a marriage held in Christ tight
What an incredible blessing these boys can cast worry out of sight

They will grow up in a house built on rock , not perfect of course
But that too is a blessing because God’s grace becomes their source
So on those days when sleep doesn’t come
Just remember He is always faithful and then some

It’s a new sanctification, a calling to disciple and train
And I know God will use it and He will also keep you sane
The news of two boys, comes great weight and even greater joys
As you begin to see your role of raising men from these boys

Just that you see the need and are ready for the ride
Leaves me in awe of you Ash, don’t worry each step He will guide
As through singlehood, courtship, marriage, lives given and one taken too soon
You have unceasingly walked faithful to the one who is promised and true

That is why I know and proclaim it today
Even through motherhood I know in your love for Christ you will not sway
I pray from tiny seed hidden away inside to men grown and married
That Si and Eli will always proclaim it is only by God’s grace they have been carried

Life is hard and messy and sometimes quite dark
And it is in this world these two boys in your womb can be that spark
Whether football star or living across the world with plenty of work to do
God’s word says He formed them, He set them apart too

He is the author and perfecter, the giver of life
And I pray these boys always remember the hope and future in the midst of life’s strife
Ash you’re the bestest and these boys already agree
After all you’re the Mamma, don’t you see?

Love you Ashy...

Dear Little Lives That Are Going to Be...

"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul."

                                                                   Psalm 143:8

The Past Year or So...
Dear little life that is yet to be,

Do you have any idea how badly you are desired? How earnestly so many voices are echoing a need to see you face to face? How loved you are even before you are real? How much your momma and daddy want you? The thought of you is so real. So real because we want to meet you so badly.

Little life that is yet to be, do you know that you are loved, that even before your creation, you are loved? Yes, right now. That is a crazy idea to grasp in this finite mind of mine—but somehow I love you and you don’t even exist. I suppose there has to come a point where faith crashes over what makes sense, drowning out the doubts and whys.

While I cannot imagine a perfect will of a sovereign God that does not have your name engrained upon His hands, I still choose to trust that it is indeed His sovereignty in which I must place my hope—whatever that means.

Because I trust Him, I know I can come boldly to His throne and cry out for mercy and grace in this time of need. For your mamma and daddy who want to know you so badly, for the doctors to have wisdom and discernment in helping your mamma have a fertile place for you to come into existence, for the ups and downs of this journey, for the waiting and trusting and hoping and waiting some more.

But really, I just know that whenever the Maker of the Universe, the One who holds the stars in the sky, the Alpha and Omega, beginning and end, Jehovah Rapha our healer, Jehovah Niessi our banner, the giver of life—whenever He decides it is time to meet you, little life that is yet to be, then you will simply be. One breath. 

He just needs to breathe into you one breath, to speak and you will be. Wow. I don’t get that. I cannot begin to wrap my brain around that. I just know He is able—beyond able. He is the only one worthy of our cries, our prayers—He hears them.  A broken and contrite heart pleases Him. So we rest and wait and trust and hope. We want you, little life that is yet to be, your mamma and daddy really, really want you.

So, we pray. Until He forms you in your mamma’s womb, in His unfathomable mercy. What a day that will be, what a miracle you will be. What a testimony to the greatness and grace of our sovereign God you will be, in faith, little life that is going to be.

Three Months Ago... {Guess what, little life that is yet to be—you are really going to be!!}

A Month (and a half) Ago... {Guess what, little [LIVES] that are going to be—there are THREE OF YOU!!!}

A Couple Weeks Ago...{One little life is sitting in Heaven with Jesus—and two of you have hearts still beating strong and so many who can't wait to meet you while you spend some time here on earth.} 

At the end of it all, He the author and perfector. He gives life and He takes it away. He is LORD. What an unfathomable blessing that He has chosen to give three lives at once, and that two of them we will get to meet soon. While the reality of a whole new life to come begins to settle in, there is no doubt in my mind what an incredible Daddy and Mamma you two are gunna make. I have seen time and time again in my life the way you have loved me as your own...taught me through doing life together, challenged me, counseled me, prayed for me, lavished grace upon me, laughed and cried with me—and continue to do so. Though, I guess a few things might change...like sharing my room when I come visit and not sleeping quite as soundly :) 

Truth be told, I am pretty jealous of these lil lives growing inside of Mamma as I type these words. Mostly because they get to grow up calling you two mom and dad for their whole lives. Day in and day out they get to watch the way their mamma trusts daddy and the way daddy protects mamma, the way they love each other so good, even in the mess. I can not imagine the legacy these little beans growing in your belly are going to leave. The way they are going to labor and wrestle to further the Kingdom and ultimately to know the King. At the end of it all, I guess this is it—what comes from the next generation. And the next and the one after that. It matters.

This is just the begining. New life brought forth out of your lives together, ultimately a testimony of God's faithfulness in all five of your lives. The thought of surrendering these babies to Him is something to be grasped—yet what peace there is in knowing that He is in control and His plan is perfect, even as we learn to count the trials joy. So exited to watch you two in your new roles as mamma and daddy...could not be anymore blessed kiddos then these two you get to raise!! 

Yes Mr. Luster, 'that is a lot of years to mess em' up'...so praise the Lord for unfathomable grace and mercies anew every morning!! 

Let's continue to intercede on behalf of the Lusters and the two being knit together inside, and the hearts of this mamma and daddy as they grieve the loss of a baby as well. 

Thankful today for these two lil heartbeats, a mamma and daddy who love Jesus above all else, and hope in Christ even in the hurt of life and the sting of death. 

As soon as she starts feeling like a functioning human again, I am sure you can find lots of updates over here from The Mamma!!!