Right now, it is Shasta cans ice cold and JoyFM songs of praise humming in the background as I press on to finish this pile of papers at work. It is lunch dates with a troubled ten year old because I'm not so different from him. It is trying to prove I am indeed smarter the a fourth grader as I run through long division in my head, doubting all the while my corrections are actually correct as I check through his schoolwork. It is the glitter on my dress that reminds me of the artwork in the mail yesterday made by tiny hands and love too good.
Right now, it is my car always starting again after it takes a little break in the middle of traffic and heat—yet again. It is the little guy hugs and big girl squeezes that I come home to everyday. It is watching the Olympics and feeling like it matters—like it all matters somehow. It is be inspired to dust off those running shoes. It is seeing lines of cars miles long outside of Chickfila as I drive down the road, thinking maybe the world is not all messed up, not quite a lost cause. It's remembering that He really is still drawing man to Himself in the midst of the brokenness.
Right now, it is this verse on my desk, the twenty-something verses I know by heart from hours of repetition these past few weeks. It is clinging to the hope of memorizing a book of the bible, of actually seeing the transformation unfold as the newness of my mind morphs into normalcy. It is being three years out of Mercy and still not being perfect{ed} but more in love with Him.
Right now, it is the picture on my desk of that barren classroom, blackboard and 3 little benches which now bear the weight of little bottoms. It is knowing that right now as I think on what is saving me, these little minds are being filled with the Word of Life—and being saved. This classroom across the world that failed to meet my wealthy standards several months ago is saving me right now.
Right now, it is the new little life growing in my friend's tummy. It is the miracles delivered through prayer without ceasing. It is my yearning to be a wife and mamma someday soon. It is the curse that is being broken as I learn to trust man and flee from my rebellious heart. It is the battle that is becoming less about me and fading out of my future. Right now, it is going to the beach in a few months that is saving me. It is my renewed desire to submit as I read Luke 2 and see that even the Son of God, the perfect one, chose to submit to his parents, mere sinners in need of grace.
Right now, it is the simple words and the open door policy. It is the family dinners and washing dozens of dishes becoming routine. It is never being alone. It is taking things day by day. It is re-training my introspective ways. It is my book for college coming in late, that I might ease into this new season. It is knowing grace needed to go boldly before the throne for mercy. It is deep conversation and a dozen friend dates this week and last. It is long dinners hosted by women oh so wise in their faith. It is letting Him fight. It is learning to be still that is saving me right now.
Right now, the past got me here. Right now is where I am, all that I am promised. Right now, the hope and grace needed for a future is saving me.
Thanks to this fellow sister and faithful blogger's challenge, I know He is saving me, even now. Please, JOIN ME in sharing what is saving you today...just come read over HERE. Share your story, your saving graces. It's simple really. Thankful for Sarah and her constant stream of vulnerability and truth.
No comments:
Post a Comment